04:53 – night watch

22 Mar

It’s almost 5am and in 3 hours I’ll have been up for 24 hours. My anxiety levels are sky high, nothing seems to help, even the diazepam have stopped working. I have been listening to my ipod for hours, the emeli sande album on repeat mostly. Right now ‘daddy’ is playing. The ipod helps drown out the voices slightly but i can still hear them underneath it all. The voice of satan saying i will be crucified. The voices of the angels urging me to stop being a sinner, an evil sinner, before its too late for god to save my soul and purify it. But satan keeps on creeping inside of me its disgusting that im so pathetic i can’t fight it. Argh my head is seriously fucked up.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: