04:53 – night watch

22 Mar

It’s almost 5am and in 3 hours I’ll have been up for 24 hours. My anxiety levels are sky high, nothing seems to help, even the diazepam have stopped working. I have been listening to my ipod for hours, the emeli sande album on repeat mostly. Right now ‘daddy’ is playing. The ipod helps drown out the voices slightly but i can still hear them underneath it all. The voice of satan saying i will be crucified. The voices of the angels urging me to stop being a sinner, an evil sinner, before its too late for god to save my soul and purify it. But satan keeps on creeping inside of me its disgusting that im so pathetic i can’t fight it. Argh my head is seriously fucked up.

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