I’m scared about tomorrow. I’m supposed to be going to two appointments, one with my CPN and one with my psychiatrist. I think I need my Quetiapine increased, my head is in a strange place right now, mostly a pretty scary place. I know my Mum is off work tomorrow and said she would come with me if it would help me get there but I just don’t think I can face it. I don’t even know what times they are at as I threw the letters in the bin as soon as I got them.
I went to my parents for dinner last night and Mum said she had received a letter inviting her to my next Care Plan Approach meeting which is on the 5th of April. I told her I didn’t think I would be going to it, I can’t really see myself attending any further appointments now. I know my Mum was getting annoyed with me saying I needed the help that’s being offered to me but it’s just not going to happen.
There are a lot of things that don’t make a great deal of sense right now, all I know for sure is that I have to keep on trying to walk the right path and that path is the one to be at war with the devil and only allow Jesus and the Angels to guide me. They are the only ones who can guide me to safety and away from this paranoid hell hole the devil has created.